by Shyler Hoy
(peoria, AZ, USA)
I watched you walk out the door that day and not come back. I never assumed the worst. To me, it was just another day… just another night. But I was wrong! When I heard that tap on the door slam so many times, I thought you had just forgotten your keys. Then, I opened it and was wrong again. The cop looked at me as if he had been doing this all day. As if he had all the words planned out once that door opened. But, then seeing me, he had lost them all. Stuck as to what to say, I knew the worst was coming when he said our last name. I clasped to the ground because I knew… I knew everything… I knew every word that was going to be said. One thing I didn’t know was how to get through it. How to tell our beautiful sons that their dad wasn’t coming home. I rushed to your side at once. What I saw next was not what I thought would be possible. In one way you were there… in another, you weren’t! Just looking at you like that killed me inside. The pain that surrounded you was too much for one’s eyes. I knew then you would never be the same guy I married. The same father you were yesterday. The pal whose friends looked up to for help and understanding. I’d hoped and prayed with all my power for you to just make it through each day. For you to see the boys again and kiss me once more. As days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months, everything seemed to be turning out good… but wrong was I again! You took a turn that changed our world forever. I couldn’t do anything to help you. I felt as if my prayers had failed you and everyone else. I was on my own for the first time in years. Life felt meaningless… then I walked through the door we once did and saw our darling boys smiling. Then, I knew it was only the start of a new one, even though you would not be there by my side every step of the way. Looking into the boys’ eyes, I knew somehow you would be. You made us strong, and now, you would be what keeps us strong. Each day that went by was one day closer to you, and this time I know in my heart that I wouldn’t be wrong when I say we would meet again.
March 15, 2009
I’d lost a dear friend to me on this date. He was drinking while riding his motorcycle. He took a turn too sharply and crashed. He was lucky to not have hurt anyone else, but not so lucky to walk away from it. He was a loving husband, step father, friend, son, and a good family man. When you were around him, you were family even if it was a yard sale and you’d just stopped by to look. He was a strong, loving guy and even though he had his problems and struggled most of the time, he always managed to keep a good heart. Just by looking at him, you could tell there was a light shining deep inside of him… a brightness just waiting to come out. He was in the hospital two weeks before he passed on from severe head trauma. Looking at him on the outside, you would never have guessed he was suffering inside. A week and a half after being in the hospital, he opened his eyes once and his step-son was there looking up at him. I think while his eyes where opened he was saying good bye and telling everyone everything would be okay and that he was off to a better place. That there was no need for tears of sadness, but tears of joy because we would see him again in the same shape and form he was in before the accident happened. I’m sad I didn’t get to say good bye… but then again, I’m not because there is no need for good bye. When I see him again, I will only say, “Hey man, glad to see you again!” I will always remember him as the happy-go-lucky guy he was and always will be.
P.S. If you are to drink and drive, just remember that you are not the only one who will get hurt. But that you will be the one left behind with guilt and wishing you had never done what you thought you could get away with. Life is too short to let slip away… to take for granted and say that would never happen to me. Just take one thing to heart: think before you act… and act before you take that drink!
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